For most teens and adults, having a boyfriend or girlfriend feels good. Why? Well the short answer is for validation and the long answer is when someone else loves you it’s a lot easier to love yourself.
In this day and age people value themselves on their relationship status and those of the people around them. For example, a girl’s best friend has a boyfriend but she doesn’t. So this girl may feel one or more of the below things;
- Low self-esteem
Yes it seems extreme but it is true. Ok imagine you are a girl or boy. All your closet friends are in relationships and you are not. In this situation would start to feel down. Why? Because unfortunately it is part of human psychology to compare yourself to others.
When you are in a secure relationship you are being told how beautiful, clever and perfect you are. So when you are no longer in a relationship, you can start to feel like you are no longer any of the things your ex-partner said you were.
So how do we change this? The truth is I don’t think there is an 100% effective way. But I do have an idea. Start to separate the relationship/sexual side of you from the friendship side. Stop seeing yourself as just a sexual being. There are so many more important things in your life than having a boy/girl friend.
Value yourself on your achievements, your personality, your compassion and your creativity.
Remember that the main reason why you aren’t with some is because the right person hasn’t become part of your life, or now isn’t the right time.
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